Builds and an Ouroboros in my household

Builds are a pain - a complete pain. But they really don't have to be. I am working hard to smooth the process where I am. Hardest part is getting the QA cycle in sync with the development cycle and with our Sprint cycle. Anyway, just wanted to give tribute to builds and their pain, and I am trying to keep in mind the hilarity that ensued in our household a few weeks back when one of our snakes tried to eat her own tail.

Anza is a really cool rosy boa, that used to be sweet, but is not handled, so now she is a bit aggressive. Especially when it is time to go and eat, in a smaller aquarium than the one she lives in with her beau Felipe (also a rosy boa of course). So, there she is, having had two baby mice already, I drop a third one in (yeah, I apologize to the mice, and I feel a bit bad for them) and she GOES for the mouse, so quickly, so violently that she gets her own tail instead in her mouth, and the mouse in her coils.

I notice that she isn't joking around either. She is pushing against the glass, straightening her hold on her tail and lining it up to go down her throat. By the time I got the boy to take me seriously about it and convinced him that we HAD to remove the tail from her mouth by force, she had a full 2 and a half inches of herself down her throat. He gently pulled on her tail, while I forced her jaws open.

It was an ordeal for sure, and for a bit I was convinced she would keep going until she choked to death. Maybe she would have. I couldn't find much online about snakes eating themselves in true Ouroboros style, but I didn't want to find out.

In the end all is well, no injuries, and she ate normally again this week. Phew. Crazy though, just crazy.

another year...

Many things drawing to a close this evening. 2008, my tower, and my study are all nearing completion to name a few. Don't bother asking, I won't tell. The time-box is sealed at midnight though, San Diego time. 2008 was an interesting year in my world. So much adventure, so much intrigue, especially in the fall and winter, when some tethers were shed.

I hadn't felt much like writing. I could blame twitter, but I often didn't feel much like tweeting either. Some of the time I am just like that. I do this cyclic thing too sometimes, wherein I make a bunch of "friends" but really there are only one or two among them that I really like that much. But I feel this need to have friends, people I can chat with etc. Then, once I have them, I don't want them anymore. There are a myriad of reasons, but I tend to alienate many and just keep a few close. Sometimes fewer than I would choose. So, I have a list of friends that I actually like but rarely, if ever, have any contact with. I sometimes wish they would reach out to me, because I don't really know how to reach out to them.

Anyhow, this is my token blog post for the year, yeah I procrastinated as usual. A little piece of me for anyone bothering to keep track. And if you are, then maybe you are a friend I don't even know about. If so, thanks.

Happy New Year.

fire stories

So, I mentioned on my twitter feed about my friends that had to run from the Rincon fire. I talked to one of them in person today. He can't go back to the reservation now, but he had to come out to get his 8yo son. Anyway, I checked the info I had already to see how accurate it was, and it turns out it was even more dramatic than what I knew already. Here is what he told me happened...
They were woken up early Tuesday morning by police going through their area. They live just down the road north and to the east of Harrah's. The fire was coming and they took their cars quickly to the Harrah's parking lot. Then J. went back to the house to get some clothes and other things and while he was inside, the phone rang. At the same time people outside were yelling at him, same message as the phone call - GET OUT! So, he didn't really realize how serious they were, until he stepped outside and saw the house next door on fire. So he fled with fire on his trail to the lot at Harrah's. Most people sheltered inside the casino as the flames chased their way across the valley floor, but J. and M. being kinda just a little crazy stayed outside to watch and feel the 75 foot flames surround them. Joining them in their heated safe zone - lots of critters, mostly coyotes it sounded like. After the fire passed they were able to sneak back later and discover that M.'s dwelling was destroyed along with everything he owned, except his vehicle. The house next door that belongs to other family members was still intact somehow. Amazing. So that is story number one...

Story number two is too long to write right now, so I will give story number three...my parents because it is short. They are OKAY and so is their house. YAY! I still keep crying sometimes when I see the destroyed houses.

enough for now.

fire fire fire

Soooo....yesterday was fun, Not! We basically watched tv all day, tracking the fires. So far we have not had to evacuate, but my parents did. I hope their home is ok. They were woken up by PAs in their neighborhood Monday morning. Well, maybe they were awake already, but they had to leave around 4 in the morning. Fortunately they are in a good spot now too, in Poway near the community center that is being used as an evac shelter. Where I am in Escondido is also close to an evac shelter - Escondido HS. Just a few blocks away. As long as that center is open, I feel ok about being here. I don't feel good about traveling the 22 miles to work though, and possibly getting shut off from home, or having the situation change while I am gone. scary.

We are also quite concerned about the park (sdrp.org) where the boy is a senior ranger. The fires in 2003 went on either side of their watershed, this one is sweeping straight through it. It really could make it to the coast. that is No Joke.
Also, the sdrp office was right in the path. If their office burned, I can't even imagine the outcome. All their equipment, their vehicles, etc. At least someone went and got the office cat Sunday night, that was a relief. When the boy left work on my birthday (sunday) he had no idea how fast it would move, and left the kitty. Someone else fortunately went and got him around midnight.

Now I have to figure out what to do about working. I can't really afford right now to miss so much time. One day was one thing, but now I have to get them to let me work from home I think, because there is no telling if they will extend evacs to our area. There are more fires this morning, and depending on the winds they could come our way. Regardless the mayor has asked again that people avoid major freeways except for emergencies. I sure hope the VPN works.

Rinpoche at DKC has recommened that people who can, do Green Tara practices, or at least just the mantra - OM TAR-EY TU-TAR-EY TU-REY SO-HA - not sure it will help but it can't hurt.

This fire is soooo hungry. It is eating Rancho Santa Fe now, I knew yesterday that it would. I have been making pencil marks on a fold out map, and so far my predictions of which way the fire would travel are sadly true. Eerie to mark out swatches and then hear a few hours later of houses lost on streets in my swatches.

Back to watching the news. take care.

what an end to the summer

Sooo, things were exciting. I learned that being a contractor in a hell-hole didn't suit me. Especially when people make up crappy stories about you. You see, as a contractor, HR doesn't really give a hoot, and apparently doesn't even care to check out reality. I am glad to have left though, the things I miss are just a handful of people, and my office.

Surprisingly I am doing just fine without an office. I had a new job within 2 weeks of leaving, and I am quite pleased so far. It is full time, and there is a huge amount of room for growth and advancement, as well as an application and team that can really use my skills.

Funny deja vu type thing happened too. When I started the contract position, someone from that place went to my previous job. We traded places kinda. I was told by many people that they felt getting me in exchange was a very good trade. The same sort of thing happened at my newest position. Someone from there left to pursue contract work (can you say greedy?) and ended up after a couple short term contracts at the place I just left. I mentioned to the sales guy that told me about it how it was a hell-hole in some ways and that I doubted this former co-worker of his would be happy there. He just laughed and said that he was happy with the pay. HA! A week later, the same sales guy came back and told me that I was right. The contractor guy told him that it was the Worst Place he had EVER worked at in his entire career. HA! told you so. And again, I have been told that the exchange of me for the other guy was to their benefit, I was the better trade they tell me.

Anyway, enough of that, I find it amusing, but it probably sounds a bit bitter. Trust me that I am not so much bitter as honest about a bad situation and trying to see a bit of humor in it. Learning and such.

Speaking of the "and such" last night was So Much Fun! I went downtown to the gaslamp and had a few drinks and some dancing. Started at Altitude to check out the bay and the ballgame. Had a beer and a shot of patron to start the evening off. Talked to a guy playing keyboard on the corner, turns out he has a house in TJ and works playing music in retirement facilities...along with sitting on the corner downtown. Interesting. Talked to some nice people in Hennessy's, because they have guiness on tap, so I had one. Hadn't tried that place before, but it worked out. One of the people I was talking to even bought me a second guiness. woohoo.
Then on to the clubs. On broadway was pretty dull, so I ended up at Belo as usual. Dancing was fun, again had a couple short conversations, some guys are very persistent. Managed to brush people off without being bitchy. Had another guiness. By this point, I was getting tired, so I went to my car for a bit and enjoyed the night air (I almost always park at the top of a particular parking garage, usually in the same spot) and sobered up a bit.

That did get me in a bit of trouble with the boy, since he didn't go with me last night...I was a bit later than I thought I would be. It was a blast though, so no worries. Today was a nice lazy day. Slept, watched tv, played video games, etc. Probably more of the same tomorrow. Hooray for work-free weekends! Another HUGE bonus of changing jobs is I don't work 55+ hours every week. 40-45 usually. Just right.

the hospital

For the record, I started writing this on July 2nd, and am just getting around to finishing it today, the 23rd.

On June 29th - Friday, the pain in my side became too much after a week. It is on my right, under my lower ribs. The urgent care doctor was a bit concerned, and based on family history thought it best to have me go to the ER and get an ultrasound and an x-ray or two. SO I did...Saturday morning (June 30th) I got up early and went to the Palomar hospital ER at 4am. They weren't too bad, it was a quieter time. The triage nurse the night before had recommended this timing. I only waited 2 hours before being taken back. They did the tests pretty quickly too, then I waited and waited, until almost noon before someone shared the test results with me. The results had been available since around 10, but the Dr. wasn't. The nurse handled it anyway, so still not sure why they didn't get me out of there and give the bed to someone else.

Anyway, nothing wrong with my organs, YAY. But the pain is still there. They gave me percocet. I haven't had it before. I told the Dr. that vicodin makes me sick, well percs are even stronger. I took a whole one Sunday morning (july 1st) on my way into the office, thinking Oh Yay, This will help the pain and I will get something done.

NOPE! Instead I got sick and spent 3 hours half asleep on my office floor until I could stand to be vertical again. So, I've been cutting the percs in half and that is working better now. It is still a struggle to take enough to help the pain without getting sick. In fact, I got sick today and thought it was from the percs, but it didn't go away, even 7 hours later, so I think I had a short lived stomach ailment. Getting hard to tell.

The good news is that although my side still hurts, it seems to be getting slightly better. Albeit at a slow pace, but I do think it is improving. I hate being all weak and icky feeling. At least I can still go dancing, as the exercise seems to help a bit. It doesn't seem to make it worse anyhow.

I did take pics at the hospital...I will post them eventually on my flickr. Maybe even this week.

too much fun

so I have been remiss again, lazy even, not writing anything for awhile. I have had plenty to write about, just didn't feel it in writing, I guess. Last weekend Friday the 13th was terrific. I left work and came home. Offered some options to the boy that I thought were good compromises, but we ended up with me going downtown by myself because he just didn't really feel like going out.

At first, it felt a bit dull and sad and boring to be by myself amongst the people on the street. I also had foregone any pain pills for most of the afternoon and could feel an edge of crankiness from that too. (pain pills are a totally different post!) But, I told myself to get over it and have fun. That was the whole point after all. So, I did. I wanted to check out Sin, so I walked around for a bit until they opened. Hung out on a corner and chatted with some very polite strangers too. As soon as the nice boy saw my wedding ring, he stopped flirting but was still flattering and interesting to talk to. So, after a bit, Sin opened and I paid my 15 bones to check it out. Empty of course, as it was only around 9:30. Even so, the music was a bit dull. Took me 5 min or so to get a guiness in my hands, another 15 to drink it casually, so I figure that venture at about a dollar a minute. I didn't return, I found it a bit on the small side, and again, the music at the time was dull. If there was a special event, or maybe to see Chloe, I might give it another shot.

On to Belo - and I had a great time dancing. A few boys did try to get my company for a dance but I deflected them smoothly and just kept to myself. It really was a lot of fun to be on my own and free to move about at a whim instead of having to corral others. I left early a bit after 1 - like I said, no pain pills for most of the day and I have been exceptionally tired lately.

Then an extremely yucky week at work - why? Because my project's release has been delayed - AGAIN - due to networking and server problems. Not readiness on the part of the code though, thank goodness. Irritating, but it is a big project. That wasn't the only big stress source. The other gargantuan project is nearing an end point as well, and of course it is getting a bit crazy as all groups work to position and get ready.

Then Friday again! YAY! This time the boy wanted to go as it was Oakenfold playing. I must admit that although I enjoy Paul and his spinning, and do recognize him as having a distinct style, and not just a little talent, it is not that big of a deal for me. As long as the music isn't dull, I am happy with the dj and dance dance dance. So, I did enjoy seeing him, but it meant that Belo was all hectic and insane. I think they let waaaay too many people in. Or maybe they just weren't spread as evenly between the two rooms...but it was a frikking sauna for sardines. I haven't seen walls dripping like that in a long while. I really miss warehouse parties. They usually had more room, although the last dripping walls were in a warehouse (it was a peculiar circumstance). People were actually leaning on me at a few points. I actually said something to them. HA! The boy had to counsel me not to start anything. hehehhee. Oh well. Despite all that, it was SO fun. We left before 2am, but mostly because we both had really hard weeks and were just physically tired. Next time I go out, I am going to try really hard to stay out MUCH later. A girl has to have goals.

Ok, enough rambling. I could write about a lot of other things, but some of it would sound like complaining and I don't want to do that. Leave it at the point that I am really tired of people who are fake, and people who prejudge and people that don't listen. But no one is perfect I guess. So I am just muddling forward and making an effort to socialize with people I don't work with currently. Anyone up for lunch in La Jolla? =)

Interesting fact, the time I started writing this is a prime already, so I did not need to tweak it at all. 1109

good is an adjective

And well is an adverb. It really isn't too difficult. And yet I hear a radio personality using "good" incorrectly. "He did good." is simply Not OK. NO-K if you will. "You dance good." equally No-k. One dances well, and does well. The dance itself is good, or the task that was done is good.

Vent over...sorry, the other one that gets me is "funner" and "funnest"
I have seen those in t.v. commercials even, and again with the radio personalities, etc. ack...Honestly, it isn't really worth worrying about. I have much larger concerns in my life. Work for one, which is quite stressful of late. I suppose it really is up to me whether or not I let it stress me out. The thing is I get stressed because I actually care somewhat. Poor me. wah. =) Not sure how to stop caring about things I care about. Or people. Wah again.

Guitar hero is fun, and a good way to not care. I bought the first game for ps2. Working my way through the songs on medium. Haven't even tried easy yet. Getting 5 stars on most, sometimes 4 initially, but the 5s are coming easy. Still not ready to play on hard on either gh or ghii. Maybe soon. Before the end of the year for sure, at least if the boy lets me play.

I have such limited time to myself, the majority of which is spent in my car. I guess that would explain why I have a second blog called Driving Rants. The other time I have to myself is on Sundays, which I have been spending a lot of at work, and then when the boy is sleeping and I am up. Like most mornings lately. I have started 'sleeping in' until 4:15/4:30 or so. I need to get up earlier than that so I can have more time. I sort of wish I never had to sleep (or eat), but I do still enjoy my lucid dreaming.

Wow, I wrote a lot. I just haven't taken the time lately. Haven't been reading much online lately either. I would like to, but just so consumed with work, that being online when I am not working is not so fun sometimes. I have been reading books and writing my feelings on paper instead lately, but not anything I could ever post. I read twitter though *wave*

yay fair

Getting into the spirit of spring/summertime. So many fun things going on, not to mention how beautiful the greenery is lately. I love trees, and the poplars that I enjoy watching so much are just gorgeous right now.

Also got to go out last Friday, June 1st. That was an absolute blast. Some coworkers had raved about Fumari, so the boy and I went and had a hooka and some drinks to start the evening. The blackberry flavor was good. The beer was cold, what more can you ask for? After, we procured the handstamp that we would use later to go back and see Christopher Lawrence, we wandered the gaslamp for awhile - saw one person I knew. Wow, in such a sea of people, I was surprised. The boy saw a second person, but I misssed that one, I think by design on their part. Quite clever, although it doesn't take much when you know that I have no peripheral vision. I had so much fun walking around though. There is so much to look at and such an extreme amount of sensory input. I love it. Barely even noticed my goosebumps.

We were going to check out Sin, but considering the cover, we decided to not waste the money just to check it out for an hour or so. We'll go back there and spend some time I think. It looks so shiny and fun. We ended up dancing the majority of the night and left right before the end of CL's set. There were a few ravers in the crowd and I must say that I truly truly miss warehouses. 1992 was a very special year. Still though, good music and dancing, again what more can you ask for (besides a little space!).

After a super busy week at work, I am so ready for fun this weekend, started it with happy hour last night. Lots of laughs unwinding with some people from work that I like, they are a convivial bunch. I do feel good about this week. I was able early in the week to help some team members and to solve some puzzles in some code we both use in our apps. That rocks. I like helping people, and when it helps me at the same time, even better. The rest of the week was just super busy. Lots of questions, more helping with other team members and lots of admin work. I like the admin stuff but I like the coding too. I guess that is what Sunday is for. Ha!

The fun today though is the Del Mar Fair. I don't give a flying rat's behind that they changed the name. It is still the Del Mar Fair to me. After all it is at the Del Mar FairGrounds! gee whiz. I haven't ridden the rides in awhile, so I think that is in order, and I plan to just run around, eat little bits of the various foods, be silly, and take random photos to satisfy the growing demand from my flickr/twitter friends. I have never been much of a photo taker, my brain takes pretty good snapshots, and hasn't run out of storage yet. Wish me luck. Yay Fair!

another early day

Wow, I managed to pull off another early day this morning. Yesterday I wouldn't have thought I could do it. I did though, up by 3:15 and out the door by 5:15. Ok, so I sat and watched little movies, that new on the lot show. much better with tivo, fo sho. hehehehhe.

Ok, I am in a silly mood. I had a fun, albeit long, day. Got to work around 6 - no breakfast. OOPS! Yeah, I got hungry around 8, but had lunch plans for 11 so I just waited. That was ok because lunch was fun. (*wave*!) I also got to hike down the road to the other building for a meeting this afternoon. Always a treat. It really was nice out, so even though I had to walk fast, it was nice.

I got smart and blocked off my calendar for the next couple of days. I will likely relent in the morning hours and unblock some of it. But if I don't block the later hours, I end up getting meeting invites for late in the afternoon. Getting there at 6, I would love to leave around 3 or 3:30. I usually work more in the evening anyhow. Not sure how much longer I will have as much freedom as I do now. C'est la vie. Everything changes.

Now that was a super boring post. All I talked about practically was work. Yikes.
Oh, I know, I will say something about the movie I saw this weekend. Bug. Yeah, it bugged a bit. I was entertained, don't get me wrong. But then I am somewhat easily entertained, so that really isn't saying much. I laughed the whole time. I am not sure I was supposed to, but I couldn't help it. I have issues with teeth, and loose teeth, and missing teeth. So I cringed at one point (YUCK!). Otherwise though, it was somewhat of a letdown. I got some interesting decorating ideas - foil with blue bug lights - soft and glowy. A bit crinkly though.

I win

Well, I win for now. I was drowning in so many projects and urgent tasks that it seemed nothing was getting done. Au contraire, it was just that they were all running in parallel and moving a bit slower as a result. So, I stopped trying to keep them all moving at once (they require frequent progress updates, which is what had motivated the concurrent motion) and knocked them out one by one.

Sometimes it is hard to remember that this really is the best tactic. Especially when there is a need to keep all parties up to date at all times. And every issue is the most important one. Well, once I picked my most important one, I was able to move that one to completion (they were all getting close anyhow) then the next and the next, etc.

I think my efforts are recognized, but I feel a bit odd about that, because I didn't do anything really extraordinary, except work a lot of hours. I hope I get paid too, because I messed up and forgot to record second meal breaks on my time card. The company I contract through requires second meal breaks for days over 10 hours. Well, that was every day on my time card except Friday and the upcoming Sunday. Turns out I worked more than 10 hours on Friday too, but I had to turn in my time card early.

Work wasn't the only thing I won at although the second win was at work, it wasn't work. People are so bloody predictable, as I think I have mentioned before. People are also rather alike, so I used that and, well, I won, that round. All in fun, at least for me. Makes me wonder if that is the case all around. I kinda doubt it, but hell if someone wants to put that much effort into something, who am I to spoil that for them. I'll play. I like to play.

I didn't get to play last night as intended. So no dancing, again! But I am going to try to make up for that today. There are clothes to buy, but fun to be had too. I plan to find it.

quanta of ?

First, the obligatory Down With String Theory!

All righty then. I've almost finished Quantum Enigma and I really have enjoyed it. It has me thinking more again about the structure of things, and all that neato keen deep and profound stuff. Philosphy mixed up with science and stirred around until you can't tell which way is up.

The thing is though, that although what the quantum enigma represents is supposed to give you a queer feeling in your gut because it tells you something "impossible" is true? Well, it just seems so right to me regardless of the seeming contradiction with the input from our senses and our reasoning, it doesn't disturb me. String theory on the other hand, it makes me queasy, it is soooo wrong. Not Even Wrong even. That will be the next read. I read more than one book at once though, like I have one I just read at lunch when I go eat by myself. Taking longer to finish that one. And I vary between fiction and non-fiction.

As it were I need to go explore the quanta of today, whatever that might represent. I have a long list of things to do. I think they require more time then I actually have available, so I will have to prioritize, and maybe go in to work early tomorrow. So, off with me, the sooner I get going, the more time I have (huh? can I make more time, can I, please?).

yay it worked

My attitude adjustment worked. Although I had a touch of vertigo today, that let up and I was able to get a lot done today and enjoy myself. Laugh and such. Back to normal. I can't type worth a darn right now though. I think I need to soak my hands in some warm water for awhile. Too much typing and difficult (for me!) songs on GHii. At least I am getting above 80%. It is on medium though, which is darn good for me. I have a hard time with the chords still.

It is getting easier though, so I figure I just need to practice. Can't torment the boy by playing too much, besides, then I just end up having to wait my turn a good part of the time. That is OK because I just play along on pretend guitar. ha!

Looking forward to going out tomorrow. Haven't decided where yet. Don't know for sure with who, but going none-the-less. Oh yes. Going to try to go to work early tomorrow. That should make it all the more interesting. By early I mean 5am again, or earlier if I can pull it off. I do need to wash my hair in the morning.

stress all gone now

Ok, I let the stress get inside my head. But then I went to work at 5am and got some of the quiet time for work that I needed. If I could, I would be a bit more extreme about it (go in at midnight or something weird like that), but I am not the only person my schedule affects, so I can't be that selfish. It would be nice to indulge though.

I would also love to indulge this Friday and go off on my own, but it isn't safe apparently, nor is it kind. I probably will go out dancing anyhow, and it will be fun so no worries all around.

I still have a lot to be stressed about, but it really isn't helping any so I am choosing to let it go. After all I am sick of people telling me in that oh-so-kind voice that I look stressed out. =) I feel sooo much better knowing I look like crap. I am just kidding around though, I appreciate their concern and that also reminds me to get over it and stop being stressed out. I'll just get done what I need to get done. I've done it many times over, so what is there to worry about.